Are you depressed, angry and upset? 7 important things to remember

Few years ago, when I was in Malaysia for an onsite assignment, I was asked to do a ‘break test’ for the one of the websites, which we had developed for the client.

Break test is nothing but a software testing procedure, in which we apply all the pressure to the software (by increasing the load, trying to crash the website etc) so as to break the system. If the system still works fine under pressure, that means, the software is ready to be deployed (or to be given for the client to use)

The same is true with our life. Sometime the blows which comes to our life are very difficult to take in. Sometimes, it affects us to that extreme where we become totally paralyzed.Break-tests are not to break you but to prove you strong

These may be some of the symptoms

  1. You may become angry and upset
  2. You may not want to talk to anyone
  3. You may want to leave somewhere and have time with your own self
  4. You may think about quitting
  5. You may want to take revenge on others
  6. You may start thinking about all such past incidents in your life
  7. You may want to cry out with a loud voice
  8. The worst thought would be to end up life

But wait! Something good is on your way. At the end of this article, there are 7 important tips. Keep reading.

Break-tests are not to break you but to prove you strong

I would say, that these kind of situations are like a ‘break tests’ for our lives. God ‘allows’ certain negative circumstances to happen in our lives for good. Not to put us down or to make us feel low or depressed, but to make us strong and to promote us to the next higher level. God wants us to PASS the test, and not to FAIL.

Difficult to digest, but that’s the truth.

Bible says,

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. (Rom 8: 28)

The challenge is to bear the pain, overcome the mental battles, and come out with a positive reaction. Many of us fail here.

There was a man in the Bible named Job. He was a very good man. He begins with God’s blessing, to do right in life. God grants him good fortune: ideal family, good health, and even abundant riches. Job is grateful and has a strong relationship with God. He does not take God’s gifts for granted, but both thanks him and loves him deeply.

One day Satan comes to God and after some talk, God brings to Satan’s attention, Job, one of God’s most perfect and upright servants, and so Satan says “Hmm, you’ve blessed that guy a lot, I bet that if you take away all the blessings, Job will Curse you to your Face.”

Ok says God, Do whatever you want to him, but don’t kill Him.

The Devil did his worst, but Job sinned not, nor charged God foolishly.

At this point begins a series of losses, starting with those dear to him, his animals, and his property and ending with his very body, so that he is in constant pain, covered in sores. Job finds no comfort from his wife (who lives, for some reason) as she only tells him to “curse God and die!” The trials do not end with these miseries, but with the emotionally devastating ordeal of having his closest friends accuse Job of some “sin” that “must have” brought the trials down upon him and his family.

God shows up in a storm. He does not accuse Job of anything. He does make it clear that Job can ask, but God’s ways are far above human understanding.

So in the end, God literally doubled everything that Job had lost during that trial or test.

(You can read the whole story of Job in the Book of Job)

Yes, if we press on, stay strong till the end patiently, God will mould our personality and bring out a more better person in us.

Job says,

…when He (God) has tested me, I will emerge as pure gold. Job 23: 10

If your character is precious like gold, the ‘break-tests’ in your life will refine and bring out a pure gold in you (a gem of personality!)

7 things to remember as you go through this painful process

You may be going through a similar struggle, fighting to find your peace in the storm. Here are few important things to keep in mind.

1. Never take quick decisions

Please don’t take any quick actions. Don’t shout or scream. Do not hit that reply button. Let me tell you, it will definitely make the situation ever worse. Hold on! Wait!

READ ALSO: 3 things you should not do when you are angry

2. Never express your feelings in social media

Especially when you are low, don’t post your feelings in Facebook or in WhatsApp status. It will draw others attention to you, and you may end up spending more time in social media giving explanations to all your dear ones, which is not going to help you. Many will give you many different suggestions which will confuse you

READ MORE: Never trust in social media

3. Never express your anger on the wrong person

Sometimes we end up poring out our emotions on our dear ones and family members who have done us no wrong. That will spoil our existing relationships.

READ MORE: How to control anger?

4. You need someone to whom you can share your burdens

The best person is God Himself. Situations like these are a strong reminder to pray. Spend some quality time alone with God. He knows exactly what you are feeling. He can empathize with you. Just speak out whatever comes to your mind. He is not only listening but is present with you to help you, to wipe your tears and to give you relief.

He is the best person who can help you to regain your strength and energy. So use this opportunity to come more close to God, because He is the One who truly loves and cares for us.

READ MORE: How to spend quiet time with God?

5. Never retaliate or take revenge

Taking revenge is not a wise idea. That’s mere human nature. We have a great moral standard to look unto, that is, the path of Jesus. So always look out for the best way of doing things

WATCH THIS SHORT VIDEO: Should you take revenge?

Read what Jesus has to say

But I tell you not to resist an evil person. But whoever slaps you on your right cheek, turn the other to him also. (Matt 5: 39)

But I say to you, love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who spitefully use you and persecute you, that you may be sons of your Father in heaven; for He makes His sun rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the just and on the unjust. (Matt 5: 44- 45)

This is the ultimate standard set by Jesus Christ.

READ MORE: The revenge that has the maximum impact

I know this is easier said that done, but you can always request for more grace from God.

READ MORE: Here is why you are unable to do the RIGHT thing you wanted to do

6. Learn some new lessons

Yes, this is the most interesting part of the experience. These kind of situations happen for good. Maybe this is a valid reminder like keeping a safe-and-good-distance with certain people OR an opportunity to get better in character OR a chance for you to experiment other options OR to do a self-life-examination. Take some good decisions like spending more in prayer and meditation, talking less, using time wisely etc

David says,

My suffering was good for me, for it taught me to pay attention to your decrees. (Ps 119: 71)

Whatever situation you are in, it is certain that there would be some interesting lessons you can learn from these experiences.

Become more humble to accept corrections from God and people.

READ ALSO: What if someone says you are wrong?

One who keeps learning will grow. The situations may put you down for some time, but not for ever, if you choose to climb up higher. Take some real quality time for your self. No need to compare your life with someone else and to feel inferior. Your life is different, and you have your own goodness.

READ ALSO: Turning problems into promotions

7. Come back to life. The best is yet to come

Never allow these situations to have a negative impact for your life. Be healed soon and come back to normal life. Get it back up and running. Your hurts will be healed though it may take some time. Spending time with God will help you in this process.

Look at Jesus. He was ill-treated, accused wrongly, beaten up and wounded by soldiers, yet He did not even speak a word against them. He has done nothing wrong, yet He was treated like a worst criminal and was given the capital punishment of death on a cross. How did Jesus react during his trial?

He prayed,

Father, forgive them; for they do not know what they are doing (Luke 23: 34)

READ ALSO: How many times should I forgive?

This same Jesus is living and with you always. He knows what you are going through. God will reward you for all the small steps you are trying to do to make the situation better. Keep pursuing righteousness. The best is yet to come. Stay strong.

READ THIS E-BOOK: 14 lessons for the suffering

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  • Joshua Valson

    Very apt summary of our quick reactions. :) Let’s always be quick to forgive and eager to be a healer in all relationships . God bless

    • Donny Thomas Kurien

      True. Its easy to break but extremely difficult to build, especially when it comes to a relationship